Over Pesach we have reflected and celebrated our freedom. Freedom from bondage and slavery. Freedom from oppression and control. Have you ever considered that at times we inadvertently become slaves to our own thoughts, feelings, self imposed limitations, assumptions and harsh internal directives? As women, we are reared to be nurtures and care givers. What a privilege! How magnificent! But is there a price? The answer is categorically ‘no’. There is reward, not cost – provided you do not loose yourself, your psyche and your own needs in the process! Saying ‘yes’, on a continual basis but feeling ‘no’ inside, results in using energy that turns inwards rather than reaching outwards and in the end may build up resentment to the very people you are trying so hard to accommodate. Learn how to be emotionally authentic, to be free of unsaid and unresolved ‘faribles’ by including yourself in the equation and taking care of yourself like a younger person whom you love. Does this mean never compromising, never being accommodating, never putting yourself out? Of course not. It does mean maintaining your dignity, self respect and permission to recognize your needs. Taking ‘responsibility’ means the ‘Ability’ to ‘Respond’ - authentically. This is the essence of personal freedom!
Dorianne Weil ‘Dr D’ is a clinical psychologist and radio personality.